I Heard About This Rumour...

There's a Rumour in the NBA...

No, that's not something a British sports journalist wrote about American professional basketball, though it could be.  (As to what that rumour might be, I'll leave it up to your imagination! ;-)).  Actually, it's the dream of a 12-year-old boy in Kentucky.

It just happens that the boy's name is Rumour. Still, this story--of a 12-year-old boy who wants to play in the NBA--would not be remarkable except for one other detail.

Since you're reading this blog, you might have guessed what that detail is. Yes, Rumour was assigned the female sex at birth. But, from the moment he could talk, he has insisited he is a boy.

The last time he wore a dress, at age 5, he insisted, "I'll never wear this again." He traded dolls for tools, and likes to ride dirtbikes and play in the dirt.  

"We fought it for as long as we could," says Brandon Brock, the stepfather of Rumour Lee Setters.  "We finally gave in" and, he recalls, realized his son wasn't going through "a phase".  Now his mother, Rachel, says, "I wouldn't have Rumour any other way."

Whether or not he makes it to the NBA, it looks like he's already experienced victory.

Trans Men Face Discrimination And Harassment In Healthcare Serviices

In this blog, when I've written of Transgender Experience rather than my own individual transgender experiences, I have concentrated on male-to-female transgenders.  After all, that is what I am, so that is the experience I know best.

But my own personal point of view isn't the only reason why my discussion of trans experience is so slanted. Turns out that most of the research on trans people--as little as there is--focuses on male-to-female trans people.  There are probably a number of reasons for that.  One that I can think of off the top of my head is the perception that we far outnumber female-to-male transgenders.

Now, since I don't know all of the research, what I am about to say is conjecture.  Here goes:  There probably are more MTFs than FTMs.  However, I don't think we outnumber FTMs as much as has been commonly assumed.  I think we don't hear as much about FTMs because there is, I believe, less stigma attached to a "woman becoming a man" than a "man becoming a woman", just as masculine females aren't ostracized as much as feminine males.  Also, I think that because the vast majority of violence against trans people is against MTFs--especially those of color--our struggles have become more visible than those of FTMs.

Still, violence and discrimination are committed against FTMs.  And the latter happens in an area in which we, MTFs, are all too familiar with it:  in health care. 

Wayne State University researcher Deirdre Shires and  Kim Jaffee recently co-authored a report based on a study of 1711 FTMs throughout the US in 2008-09 and recently published in the journal Health and Social Work. Most of those surveyed were aged 25 to 44 years old. Three-quarters were living full-time in their non-birth gender and a similar proportion had undergone,  or were undergoing, some medical aspect of gender transition.  

Of those surveyed, 42 percent reported some form of discrimination--ranging from verbal abuse and unequal treatment to, in a number of cases, physical assault.  The report doesn't specify which health-care professionals (doctors, nurses, technicians or others) perpetrated the discriminatory and abusive behavior against the FTMs.  

The study's authors cautioned that their findings may not apply to the entire transgender community.  Dr. Laura Erickson-Schroth, a psychiatrist with New York University may have given one reason why, though perhaps not the one the study's authors had in mind.  She says, "the sample was skewed toward white, young, college-educated people with jobs and private health insurance".  That bias is probably not the fault of the researchers, for Dr. Erickson-Schroth was describing the sort of person most likely to answer (or, in the case of the trans community, even know about) surveys like the one Shires and Jaffee conducted. 

Thus, "If 42 percent of that group is reporting discrimination, the number may be even higher for others," according to Erickson-Schroth, who edited the book, Trans Bodies, Trans Selves.

Perhaps the most disturbing finding of all is that 65 of the study's participants said they never accessed care in a doctor's office or hospital at all.  Some may do so because they don't have insurance. But a more likely explanation--and one I've heard from both FTMs and MTFs--was articulated by Shires:  "I can't help but to wonder whether they avoided care completely because they feared harassment or discrimination".  If such is the case, I can understand:  Few things feel worse than being mocked, called names or, worse, being denied care or given inappropriate care by someone who's taken a professional oath to help. I say this from a couple of experiences I had early in my transition.

The taunts and intimidation I experienced came from two nurses in a specialty hospital where I was referred. I told the receptionist I was leaving and would seek my care elsewhere.  She called a doctor, who apologized and talked encouragingly to me before performing the work for which I'd gone to that hospital.

So, my advice to any trans person who experiences discrimination or harassment is to first report it to someone in the office, clinic or hospital.  If no one is available, or no one is wiling to help, then it should be reported to an organization like the Transgender Law Center, the Transgender Legal Defense and Education Fund or the National Center for Transgender Equality.

Too Unconventional

Maspeth is a Queens neigborhood only two miles from my apartment.  I pass through it frequently and even stop once in a while, as one of my favorite Italian-American bakeries--the Russo Bakery--is there.

For a long time, it was a conservative blue-collar enclave inhabited mainly by immigrant and second- and third-generation Italian and German families.  More recently, Poles and Albanians have moved there, fleeing the poverty of their native lands.  It is a quiet neighborhood, long regarded as safe. 

However, it has not been terribly welcoming of diversity.  Along with the Poles and Albanians, Mexicans and other Latin Americans have been moving there, to the displeasure of some longtime residents.

It's also been a religious--mainly Roman Catholic--enclave.  On Sundays, the churches are full and, during services, streets are deserted.  Once the masses and services end, families throng down the streets or flock into their cars for long Sunday brunches or dinners at the homes of family members and friends, or in the local restaurants.

In such a milieu (Such a word would never be uttered there!), it's not surprising that not many gay people, let alone couples, move in.  Or that a young woman is told she can't bring her boyfriend to the prom because he's too "unconventional".



Actually, Anais Celin was informed that Nathaniel Baez's gender transition was "too unconventional" for the pastor at Martin Luther High School.  The school is affiliated with the Missouri Synod, as are most Lutheran churches in the eastern United States. While the Evangelical Lutheran Church has allowed the ordination of non-celebite gay clergy members and has consummated same-sex unions for the past five years, the Missouri Synod does not permit either.

Even though Maspeth has remained a largely conservative community, it's still part of the most diverse county--Queens, as in the borough of New York City--in the nation.  I cannot understand how a school in such a setting, even if it is affiliated with a church that takes the stance it does on homosexuality, can deny a young woman the right to bring her boyfriend to the prom because his gender identity and expression are "too unconventional".

Then again, Maspeth is next door to Ridgewood, where trans woman Amanda Gonzalez-Andujar was brutally murdered four years ago. And the school is named for Martin Luther, a notorious homophobe, even for his time and place.

It Gets Better For Them, Too

By now, you've probably seen the ads, Public Service Announcements and videos that try to reassure LGBT youth that "It Gets Better."  Columnist Dan Savage started the project; since then, a number of celebrities, including President Obama, have made videos bringing that message to You Tube viewers.

So far, we've seen adults giving that message of hope to young people.  And, young people have offered it to their peers and those slightly younger than themselves.

However, children and teenagers who are, or believe themselves to be, on the LGBT spectrum aren't the only ones who need to hear such a message. Sabine Bartlett knows that very well.

She was taunted and bullied--but not for being part of the "rainbow" herself.  Rather, kids harassed her--to the point that she's now home-schooled--because her mother, who is divorced from her father, transitioned into manhood.

Her mother began that process when Sabine was 13.  Now, three years later, she says, "It's hard to face the fact that someone who is close to you changes at all--especially a change that big."  She "felt a sense of loss," she recalls, until a year later, when she saw that her mother was "a much happier person."

This sixteen-year-old has some great wisdom to share with any of her peers who might be in a position like hers:  "It usually gets easier after a while and, despite the changes, your parent will always be the same person.  Only, maybe a bit happier."