He's The Best Tennis Player In The State--And A Fine Swimmer, Too!

Some of us in the LGBT--especially the T--community have complicated relationships with sports.

In my day, one stereotype of gay boys--and, by extension trans girls (for the latter were considered, if they were at all, to be more extreme versions of the former)--was that they weren't any good at sports.  In fact, one way people expressed consternation at finding out a boy was gay was to say, "but he's so good at sports!"

The fact is, many a gay boy and trans girl has played "under cover", if you will, on boys' sports teams.  I'm sure many a young lesbian or trans boy has done the same on girls' teams. However, because of the stereotypes of the time, a masculine girl who played sports was usually seen as a "tomboy" and given a bit more leeway than a feminine boy.

Nearly all of us who played sports in high school or even college experienced some kind of harassment or even outright bullying.  Still, many of us were spared the worst treatment accorded boys who were--or were perceived as--gay or girlish because sports and athletes are so revered in many schools.  At least, I can say that was the case for me.

But how could things have been different if trans kids could have played on teams designated for the gender by which we identified?

In the time and places where I grew up, such a thing would have been unthinkable to most parents, teachers and school administrators. Much of that had to do, of course, with the stereotypes I've just mentioned--and the fear that trans people (especially trans girls) were sexual predators.  But I have often thought that being allowed to play on teams for our true genders could have helped us in so many ways, from "coming out" to beginning our lives in the genders by which we know ourselves.

Recent events are showing that what I have just said is not a naive or idealistic fantasy.  Among them is the Maine Principals' Association adoption of a new policy that allows trans kids to play on teams according to the gender by which they identify.  That has been a great thing for the tennis team of  Mt. Ararat High School in Topsham, Maine, which has lost only one of its twelve matches so far this year.  One reason for that is Leo Eichfeld, the state's top player.

Yes, you read that right: He's the best high-school tennis player in the whole state of Maine.  And, yes, he's trans.  In fact, he "came out" to his teammates at the beginning of the school year.

He also swims for his school's team.  Actually, he was doing that even before he started playing tennis.   When he goes into the water, he wears a special chest binder and swimsuit that covers him from shoulder to knee.

Some would say that was an even bolder move than being on the tennis team--or just about anything else he could have done.  "It wasn't like he joined the debate team," says his coach, Tracy Doviak.

And, in case you were wondering, Eichfeld swims the 50-yard freestyle and the 100-yard backstroke. By the end of his first season, he'd shaved five seconds off his time for each.

He says that his transition has been relatively easy compared to other trans people he knows about.  Part of that was the acceptance he experienced from his teammates, classmates and others in his community.  Also, he said, competing helped him to "get the energy out".

Now, I know that not all trans kids are, or want to be, athletes.  But for those who have such inclinations, Leo Eichfeld's story shows us how they--and their families, schools and communities--can benefit.

Blake Brockington: Another Trans Teen Suicide

Last year he was a homecoming king.  

Now he's dead, an apparent suicide.

What went wrong?  The one-word answer: hate.

Blake Brockington transitioned during his sophomore year in East Mecklenburg High School in Charlotte, North Carolina.  In January, he recounted his struggles of coming to terms with his identity and finding acceptance.  "When I got my period," he recalled, "my aunt told me, 'Welcome to womanhood'.  I was like Nooo!"  He was forced to wear dresses to church and family events.

He "came out" to his teachers and stepmothers.  "My family feels like this is a decision I made," he said.  "They think, 'You're already black, why would you want to draw more attention to yourself?'" But, he explained, "It's not a decision. It is who I am.  I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy."

Things got so bad that he moved in with a foster family.  With their support, he got counseling and started his transition.  But, it seems, the damage had already been done.  Even being crowned the homecoming king had its price:  "Really hateful things were said on the Internet."  It was hard, he said, to "see how narrow-minded the world really is."

Blake, though, experienced something worse than the narrow-mindedness of the world:  narrow-mindedness in his family.  In that, his story parallels that of Leelah Alcorn, the Ohio trans girl who, at age 17, killed herself in December.

W.H. Auden wrote, "We must love one another or die."  He knew, as well as anybody, that hate kills.  That is why I will now call the deaths of Leelah Alcorn and Blake Brockington what they are:  murders.  They were killed by those who hated them, even if those people didn't lift a finger to hurt them.  Those same people did not give them the love and support they needed, and that we all need.

His Son Is No Longer In The Closet

I won't make any "trapped in the closet" jokes.  I promise.

Too late, you say.  Oh, well.  At least you might know what's coming next:  R. Kelly's son came out as transgender.  

Thirteen-year-old Jay came out to his mother, who has given him her full support.  However, it seems that Dad is not aware of the situation.

It will be interesting, to say the least, to see how he responds to the news.  After all, for all of his talent, he's best known for peeing on teenaged girls in the sudience during one of his concerts.