Oral Problems and Sleep

Well, there are certainly some things that don't change with one's gender. Today I experienced one of them--namely, something oral.

I know what you were thinking. (How would I know, right?) But it's not that. However, it did involve a man sticking things in my mouth and inflicting pain on me.

Yes, today I had oral surgery. A root canal I had about ten years ago developed an infection. And it just happens to be in the tooth directly below my sinus cavity. That, according to the oral surgeon (and a few other sources) may be the reason why my headaches and sinus problems are frequent. True, I do get migraines. But I also get other headaches that I know are unrelated.

I hope he's right. For now, I've got a real headache. But most of the pain is coming from the surgery. Actually, the pain isn't quite as bad as I thought it would be. Nonetheless, I wish it would go away.

The weird thing is that I expect my cheek to look puffed up, like what one might find on a cross between a squirrel and President Nixon. But, looking at my face, one couldn't tell that my gum was cut open and stitched. So, I could go out with Dominick: I am still more or less presentable, or at least as presentable as I can be made to be. But I'm not going out with him or anyone: I'm just too tired. In fact, I fell asleep before I booted up my computer and started writing this, and I'll probably go back to sleep after I finish or abandon this entry.

Jean Valentine once told me that a piece of writing is never finished, only abandoned. I may have financed some psychiatrist's time share in the Hamptons when I told that to my composition students one semester, back when "bear" referred to me and not the Stock Market. That's what I was: The Scare Bear. Now I try to be a Care Bear. People tell me that I am one.

Tonight will be about self-care: the medicine the surgeon prescribed to prevent an infection from forming, Tylenol with codeine (the kind for which you need a prescription) and of course my estrogen and anti-androgen. The first two drugs I'll take until they run out, which will be in a few days. Now I'm realizing that I'll be taking the anti-androgen only for another few weeks. And the dosage of my estrogen will be reduced.

But I'm sure I'll be on Tylenol with codeine or some other really strong painkiller for some time after the surgery. Maybe an anti-infection pill, too.

One thing I don't need now is a sleeping pill! My eyelids are growing heavier. So I'm abandoning (I cannot lie to Jean!) this entry. But not whoever is reading this, and especially not the one who is writing it.